To acquire balance means to achieve that happy medium between the minimum and the maximum that represents your optimum.
The minimum is the least you can get by with.
The maximum is the most you’re capable of.
The optimum is the amount or degree of anything that is most favorable toward the ends you desire.
–Nido Qubein
Lets allow that quote to inspire us today.
Balance.
My life lacks this. In a ridiculous way.
I need to reflect. To vent. I just ran Leslie’s ear off with my "new plan" to implement some balance and schedule to my soon-to-be-psychotically-crazy-summer, and I think I need to write it out as this always helps me. And maybe YOU can help me too!
I feel like I’m always on the go…
get up,
get ready for work,
get Porter ready,
run him to the sitter,
run to work (and as always, am late),
leave work, run to get Porter (or some days, Aria and then Porter… who are always both on different sides of town),
run home to lay Porter down for a nap
some days, run Aria to her dads office, or to riding lessons or run to Ann Arbor to pick Avery up from school.
run to a session.
RUN RUN RUN.
Damn, I should be 110lbs by now!
I know right now its crazy because I’m still working at Bean, and I’m probably taking on more clients than I should be, but who knows where life will be next year and maybe photography will be my primary income. WHO KNOWS.
And, I’m also doing a lot for Lauren. Avery is in school in Ann Arbor, and the past few weeks I’ve done a lot of running for her. I’m now realizing I need to start saying no when I know it will inconvenience me more than the money is worth. Like today, for example. I told her I’d take Aria to riding lessons at 3. Well, Porter naps from 1-4 (give or take some time on each end), and Ryan isn’t home until 3:30. So, I ended up having to recruit my OWN babysitter for Porter so I didn’t have to wake him to take her to riding. What sense does that make? I babysit someone else’s child so I can have someone else babysit my child? Stupid me. I take the blame, as I am the one who says yes to everything asked of me. I’m a pleaser. I try to make everyone happy, and help everyone out. And that is leaving me ragged, tired and run down.
I seriously have work (photography) on the brain 24/7. Which is a good and bad thing. I LOVE my job, I do. Its working great for me, and I ENJOY what I do. But in doing this, I am shorting my family. I’m giving my maximum to my business and my minimum to my family.
So, I’ve recruited a babysitter for the summer for 2 mornings a week. I am currently scheduling 3 sessions a week, and at the moment they are all on different days and most are after Ryan is home, so no sitter is needed. But there are still many many things with my business that need to be done at home in the office… bookkeeping, orders, proofing (ah! the proofing!), client galleries, emails, emails, emails, website work, sending orders to the lab, packaging orders… the list goes on. I can’t do this stuff when Porter is awake.
My plan is to have Sam (my brother’s ex-girlfriend, she’s a SWEETHEART) come from 8:30-12 two days a week and take Porter to the park (we have 3 within walking distance of our house) and play with him. I’ll take a lunch break and eat lunch with them and Sam can leave. I’ll spend a little one-on-one with P-man, put him down for a nap, and then have about 3 more (hopefully) uninterrupted hours to work. I’ll then call it a day when Ryan gets home.
That would also allow me to have "business hours" where I can set times to talk to clients uninterrupted… no whining toddler, no tv in the background, no tantrums etc etc.
*SIGH* (I seriously just sighed…)
This is sad. I seriously wrote in my schedule book "Porter Day: No Work" on my empty days of the week. Is that pathetic?
Thanks for letting me vent. If anyone else works from home, I’d love your input/advice. I’d love ANY input/advice… seriously!
If any of you actually READ through this post, BLESS YOUR HEART!
I’ll leave you with a picture of my super-adorable little man in his new madras shorts, and his new super-cool shades. Styyylin. 
nicolebarczak.com 
Oh Nicole… he’s SOOO cute! Love the shades!!
Your plan sounds good. I have no idea how I’m going to fit everything into my life once I go back to work…
Vent to me any day. I know I do my fair share of rambling too. I think that it’s a good idea blocking off time for work purposes. Let me know if you need any help with Porter. I would be glad.
Hey girlie… im beginning to realize that you and I are too much alike… did you read my post (I think it was last week) about balance? My life lacks it so bad and its such a tough concept to explain. I understand completely where you are coming from. I asked for comments on my blog about peoples advice about balance and my aunt told me that the most important thing is not to sweat the small stuff. I know thats easy for a lot of people to say… but seriously think about what that means. You have your priorities and intentions in the right spot and remember whats most important is that your happy. Life does a great job balancing itself when you learn what makes you happy despite the demands on us as working moms. Especially with little guys such as ours that seriously DONT STOP moving unless they are asleep. You are doing a wonderful job in all that you do, you are just tough on yourself so it seems so taxing sometimes. Believe me I understand because im exactly the same way! ttyl
Venting is good!
You are not alone!!! With my 4 kids and the two weddings I am working on right now- i am about ready to loose my mind! Not to mention the part time job at Gymboree 3 nights a week! :O) Sheesh!!!
I was sad because I just realized my boys did not do thier homework and it is DUE TOMORROW. SO, now we all have to get up a little earlier and do the stinking homework that should have been done while I was at work.
Oh and proofing- i hate proofing!!! I love doing my photography jobs- I just hate the proofing!
The way I fit it all in is insane- I stay up until 3 am most nights (or should I say mornings?).
Venting is good!
You are not alone!!! With my 4 kids and the two weddings I am working on right now- i am about ready to loose my mind! Not to mention the part time job at Gymboree 3 nights a week! :O) Sheesh!!!
I was sad because I just realized my boys did not do thier homework and it is DUE TOMORROW. SO, now we all have to get up a little earlier and do the stinking homework that should have been done while I was at work.
Oh and proofing- i hate proofing!!! I love doing my photography jobs- I just hate the proofing!
The way I fit it all in is insane- I stay up until 3 am most nights (or should I say mornings?).
Venting is good for you!
You are not alone!!! With my 4 kids and the two weddings I am working on right now- i am about ready to loose my mind! Not to mention the part time job at Gymboree 3 nights a week! :O) Sheesh!!!
I was sad because I just realized my boys did not do thier homework and it is DUE TOMORROW. SO, now we all have to get up a little earlier and do the stinking homework that should have been done while I was at work.
Oh and proofing- i hate proofing!!! I love doing my photography jobs- I just hate the proofing!
The way I fit it all in is insane- I stay up until 3 am most nights (or should I say mornings?).
Wow, my post is long- sorry! :O)
I think the “business” hours are a really good idea Nicole. I think just separating your work time from your family time will make a big difference. I think multi-tasking takes a lot more energy than we realize and just makes everything more stressful. Many of the things we “have to” do everyday would probably be much more enjoyable if we slowed down and took the time to separate things a little more and in turn we’d be able to do each a little better, you know? I know, easier said than done!
But at least you’re trying to figure this out early in the game… and hopefully you’ll quickly be able to find the right balance for you and your family. And that not only your family, but your business benefit from the changes you want to make.
Thanks for the good thoughts to reflect on and the motivation for all of us to be more intentional about this stuff!
I had to stop doing Weddings/Events, but I still tell vendors to send me their stuff to promote them. My kids are old enough that I have all day to work on things usually, but also are in that middle-age-kid group (10, 8, & 4 1/2yrs old) that it’s useless to pay a sitter (that’s only a few years older than my oldest is) a ton of money to watch 3 kids just so you can DO your work. Which, in turn, just goes partially back to the sitter anyway. ;P
I commend you for being able to keep your head on straight and making both your job at teaching AND your Photography job high on your priority list while still balancing family as well as you do. You balance much better than a lot of parents I know and once you can learn to say, “NO”, to things people ask of you and not feel guilty, you’ll feel much more relaxed and can enjoy your personal time much better.