Happy 8th Birthday, Porter Evan!

Porter…. again, I will always say this… HOW are you getting so old?  The days are SO so long, and sometimes filled with grumpiness and frustration, but the years are SO short, and so bittersweet.  I adore the person you are becoming.  My god, you are the most sensitive, caring boy ever.  (Well, not exactly sensitive and caring toward your brother, but… we’re working on that!).  I am always amazed at how big your heart is.  

The other day I sent you to school with snacks for the week.  It is your responsibility to eat one snack a day at snack-time.  On Wednesday you told your dad and I that you had “14 tiny heart candies for snack, and that’s all”  I started to grill you on why you didn’t have a snack, as I’d JUST reminded you that day that you need to be responsible with your snacks.  You explained “I gave it to Max.  He didn’t have a snack because he gave his to Leah, so I gave him mine.”   Stopped me dead in my tracks… and my heart exploded on the spot.  My boy, never lose your kindness… never lose your heart.

You are such a helpful boy, and always have been.  Whenever it snows, you shovel our sidewalk and often our driveway.  And then you head to the two neighbors houses and shovel their sidewalks.  Even if its only 1/2″ of snow.   The other day Mr. Steve’s dog Dexter was loose before school.  You threw on my Uggs, a coat and ran out to get him and take him home.  Never mind it was 5* out, or windy and cold.   You came back and said your feet were frozen because my boots had fallen off of you.   Later that evening Mr. Steve told daddy to thank you for bringing Dexter back.  And he told him that Dexter had drug you through the 3′ snow drift between our driveways, and that’s how you lost your boots.  Oh my goodness we laughed so hard!

You’re very interested in becoming a Police Officer when you grow up.  I can definitely see this happening!  You love to be bossy and try to make people follow the rules.  Especially Hudson and Amelia!  You’re a true oldest child, that’s for sure!

This year I’ve noticed some new traits in you.  Well, maybe they’re traits you’ve always had, but they’re just blossoming more now that you’re getting older.  Your teacher mentioned to me one day that “he remembers being the shy kid in class too” meaning… he could empathize with you being quiet and shy in class.  This stopped me dead in my tracks.  Porter?  Shy?  No way.  But the more I watch you in class, the more I observe you at school, you are reserved. And quiet.  And I wouldn’t go so far as to say shy but you aren’t the loud, boisterous, obnoxious boy we see at home.   You’re still friendly and outgoing, but you have this reserved peace about you.   You’re a good kid… a dependable one in class.  You are proud of your accomplishments, and kind to others.

You can still be kind of sneaky though.  One Thursday while I was volunteering at school, you came down to Hudson’s class at 2:45, a whole 15 minutes before I usually take you guys out of school on my volunteer days.  I asked what you were doing and you said you’d asked to use the bathroom and then “just decided it was close enough to the end of the day I’d come down and see if you were ready.”  I shooed you back to class and as you walked by, one of the teachers at school said “Is he your son?”  I told her yes.  She said “I just love him!  He is such a neat kid. We have some great conversations.  He’s a good kid.”   I am telling you, Porter… that made me so so proud.  I was beaming.

This year has been challenging with you as you’ve started to lie to us.  Its not usually anything serious, but we catch you in lies quite often.  I’m not sure if it is a stage, or if its just your age, but oh my…. I can’t wait for it to be over.  We’ve stressed over and over how important it is to tell the truth, and that we are family and we don’t lie to each other.    Still, we will catch you in fibs.  A lot of times it is sneaky things like… Daddy told you not to take anymore hotwheels outside so you told him you were going to go upstairs to play legos.  You came back down with some hotwheels stuffed in your pocket and Daddy busted you.  You told him “I changed my mind and decided I didn’t want to play legos.”  Yeah… still doesn’t mean you don’t have to listen to what he told you earlier!   Porter, Porter, Porter.  

You still love football best out of your sports.  You enjoyed wrestling and you seem to really enjoy baseball as well.    I’m excited for your new adventure with Cub Scouts this year- I think this will be right up your alley.

Porter, I know sometimes I can forget how sensitive you are.  And sometimes… okay, a lot of times… I can be really hard on you and expect a lot from you.   There are times I realize I’ve crushed you and I apologize and I feel terrible.  I pray that you will always remember that I’m only human, and I love you so much even though there are times I know you think otherwise.  I know the road ahead has many ups and downs and there will be times you don’t like me at all, and times you’ll think I’m against anything you stand for.  But Porter, please always remember I love you so much and I’ll always be proud of you, and always be your biggest fan.

Love, Mama.

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