I want to sit down and write about this weekend before time slips by, I forget half of it, and suddenly it feels irrelevant. I’ve been working on this post for the past week and finally… got all the thoughts out in writing.

Hagyard. What a weekend.

Truly such an incredible experience for both my girls (one riding and one “grooming”) and for me as a mom. Every year, I’ve heard about people heading down to Kentucky to ride in the Hagyard TEAM event, but it always seemed like something that really good riders did.

Now, keep in mind, this is coming from a mom who grew up trail riding, whose kids ended up at an eventing barn pretty much by accident, and who, five years ago, honestly couldn’t have told you the difference between eventing and hunter/jumpers. (And OH MY GOSH, am I glad we stumbled into the eventing world and not hunter/jumpers!)

ANYHOW. Amelia has worked incredibly hard this year, and really, for the past two years with Diva. When she found out a couple of her friends were going to Hagyard this year, she wanted to go, too. We decided, what the hell. Let’s do it.

I’ll be honest, though. As a mom, I was nervous. Was Diva ready? Was Amelia ready? Were they good enough? Were we really going to haul a horse out of state, stay the entire weekend, and just hope for the best? What if Diva completely freaked out at the Kentucky Horse Park and couldn’t focus on her rides? What if she refused jumps on the cross-country course because she’d never schooled them before? What if we drove all the way to Kentucky and it was a complete disaster?

But here’s the thing. As a mom of an 18- and 20-year-old, I know all too well how quickly these years fly by. And one of my absolute greatest joys is watching my girls ride and do something they love so much. I also know how quickly teenagers can change their minds, their interests, their moods, and whatever else they’re into these days. So while they’re this passionate about riding, I want to soak up every single minute of it.

So I said, fuck it. Let’s go to Kentucky.

The Hot Mess Express Heads South

First off, let me tell you that this entire weekend was basically sponsored by duct tape, a flathead screwdriver, and ratchet straps. Good grief. We rolled into Kentucky like the Hot Mess Express.

A little backstory (damn, I’m wordy, I’m sorry). My trusty “farm truck” is my father-in-law’s old Dodge Ram with 220,000 miles, every warning light on the dashboard illuminated, and broken four-wheel drive. Ryan was NOT particularly enthusiastic about me hauling horses to Kentucky in it.

Personally, I love that damn truck. It stays hooked up to the horse trailer, gets us to the barn and back for lessons, and I will forever praise that beast. Even if the step bar did fall off in a hotel parking lot last year and we had to abandon it in the bushes.

ANYWAY. Ryan’s friend (well, technically his friend’s dad, but he’s become a good friend of Ryan’s, too) was selling his old Cadillac Escalade for cheap. And Ryan, ever the bargain hunter (is he turning into my grandpa??), bought it, put a little money into it, and got some new tires.

The night before we were supposed to leave, he hooked it up to the horse trailer and… Ummm. She was riding a little low in the back. EEEK.

But Friday morning rolled around, and it was shit or get off the pot. I figured the worst that could happen was that the truck would break down, I’d leave it on the side of the road, rent another truck, hook up the trailer, and bring a rental home. Right?!

Everything is figureoutable. So off we went. Just us three girls. #TeamBarczak. Headed to Kentucky for a weekend of horses and adventure!

Except I was about in tears before we even got out of Michigan. I’d never driven this truck before, let alone hauled a horse trailer with it. It was dark, rainy, and the dirt roads made the whole setup feel wobbly and unsteady. I was seriously questioning every decision that had led me to that moment. I almost turned around and asked Ryan to unhook and put the trailer on the Dodge and I’d just chance it.

But once we got on the highway, I realized it wasn’t so bad. No biggie. We’ve got this. Until we got to the Kentucky Horse Park and the damn hitch practically bottomed out on the speed bumps. And we rolled into the barn clicking and clacking. My word. But we made it!

And Diva? She was an absolute GEM. Amelia hacked her around Friday evening to let her stretch her legs and get familiar with everything, and Diva acted like she’d been doing this her whole life. Not spicy, not worried, not particularly concerned about being somewhere new with a whole bunch of other horses. Just completely chill. Blessss I love this mare!

Duct Tape Fixes Everything. Right?

Saturday morning, we headed to the trailer to grab Amelia’s bridle and martingale, which she’d left in the tack room of the trailer (instead of unpacking with all her other tack….). She pulled on the paddle handle to open the door and… SNAP. Broke it.

Well, shit. Now we couldn’t get into the tack room. Which was a problem, considering Amelia needed those pieces of tack she forgot to unpack and also, how exactly were we supposed to get everything home?!

Thankfully, we had friends there who helped us MacGyver our way inside. We ended up using hot pink duct tape to keep the latch from catching so we could use just the deadbolt to lock it. And a flathead screwdriver to pry the door open. Hillbilly engineering at its finest. But hey, problem solved.

Oh Yeah, We Were Actually There to Ride Horses!

Despite our questionable transportation situation, the weekend itself was absolutely incredible. Friday was cold, but Saturday and Sunday were beautiful. And I really, really loved the whole team atmosphere. We had our stalls together, parents pitching in, and enough snacks, lunches, and food options to feed a small army. Everyone was helping everyone, cheering each other on, and just enjoying being there. And because the riders were all competing within minutes of each other, we actually got to watch everyone’s rides!

We also managed to assemble a pretty impressive documentary crew. A few of us videoing from different angles, others taking photos. Between all of us, I think we captured just about every second of the weekend. LOL!

And our trainers, Jen and Britt? I really can’t say enough good things about them. Jen was competing with two horses herself, but Britt was everywhere, making herself available to coach and support all the riders. The encouragement, the positivity, the willingness to help, and just the overall support they gave these kids all weekend was incredible. We are so lucky to have them.

Dressage: Always Room for Improvement!

Amelia’s dressage test wasn’t exactly their best. Diva kept jigging during the free walk, and the judge’s comments were pretty much the usual suspects. “Needs connection.” “Hollow back.” “Needs to bend.” Yep. Yep. And yep. All things they’re working on.

But you know what? Amelia came out of that arena proud of herself and proud of Diva. And I just love that about her. Even when things aren’t perfect, she finds the good. She recognizes the progress. She doesn’t let a less-than-stellar test ruin her day. She just absolutely adores that horse. Watching the relationship these two have built over the past couple of years is one of my favorite parts of this whole journey.

Cross Country:

Cross country was that afternoon, and this was probably the phase I was most nervous about. A new course. New jumps. A horse who can still be a little looky. And a kid who was about to ask her to tackle all of it. I had no idea what to expect. But Diva was INCREDIBLE. She took everything in stride. She was brave, confident, and willing, and the two of them went DOUBLE CLEAR! No refusals. No time faults. I was SO proud of them!

All that worrying I’d done about whether Diva was ready, whether she’d be overwhelmed, whether she’d refuse unfamiliar jumps… And there she was, proving she was perfectly capable of rising to the occasion. I love cross country. I really do. There is just something about watching a horse and rider trust each other enough to gallop across a field and jump solid obstacles that gets me every single time.

Show Jumping in the Rolex Arena!

Sunday was show jumping, and this was the part Amelia was probably most excited about. She got to ride in the Rolex Arena! How freaking cool is that?!

Again, I wasn’t sure what Diva would think. It’s a big arena, lots of things to look at, and a pretty different atmosphere from what she’s used to. But once again, Diva showed up ready to do her job. Was it a perfect round? Nope. They chipped a rail, and there were a couple of wonky jumps that made me wonder how on earth Amelia manages to stay in the saddle sometimes. LOL! But they did it! And I was so proud of both of them.

It’s funny watching these two because, on one hand, I can see just how incredibly far they’ve come. And on the other hand, I can still see all those green moments that remind me how much they’re learning together. Diva might occasionally lob herself over a jump or decide something looks suspicious, but she’s trying. And Amelia just keeps showing up, learning, and loving that horse through all of it. I can’t wait to look back at these photos next year, and the year after that, and see how much more they’ve grown.

The Hillbilly Express Rides Again

Of course, we couldn’t leave Kentucky without a few more mechanical adventures. Because apparently the duct-taped trailer door wasn’t enough. When we went to pack up, the back hatch of the Escalade decided it no longer wanted to close.

Wonderful.

So I rigged up a ratchet strap to hold it shut.

Let’s recap: We now had a horse trailer with a hot pink duct-taped door that required a flathead screwdriver to open, an Escalade with a ratchet strap holding the back closed, and a hitch that was practically dragging on the ground. Oh, and somewhere along the way that weekend, the truck had started making a weird noise whenever I turned left. Sounded like a tire rubbing on something. But who TF knows?!

We were a SIGHT. But you know what? We made it there, we made it through the weekend, and we were going to make it home.

The drive home was long, and after three days of horses, excitement, walking all over the Kentucky Horse Park, and general chaos, my brain was pretty much fried. Naturally, the girls decided this was the perfect opportunity to catch up on homework. Which meant I got to spend the drive home being asked for my opinions on speeches and having fifth-grade math problems read aloud to me.

Girls. Please. I had approximately three functioning brain cells left, and they’re all focused on keeping this questionable vehicle and horse trailer moving toward Michigan. LOL!

Would We Do It Again?

In a heartbeat. For all my second guessing beforehand, all the mechanical issues, the duct tape, the ratchet straps, and the general ridiculousness of getting there and back, I wouldn’t trade that weekend for anything.

Because here’s the thing… it wasn’t really about the scores, the ribbons, or even getting to ride at the Kentucky Horse Park. It was about watching Amelia and Diva take on something new together. Watching Amelia’s confidence grow and seeing how far they’ve come from where they started two years ago. It was about watching Eloise cheer on her sister, help with Diva, and soak up the whole experience, already dreaming about being the one in the saddle next year. It was about the friendships, the teamwork, the parents cheering on kids who weren’t even their own, and the trainers who pour so much into these riders.

And for me, it was another reminder of why I keep saying yes to these adventures, even when the logistics are a little ridiculous and I have a million reasons to worry. Because these years really do go by so damn fast. And someday, I know I’ll look back and miss the weekends spent hauling horses all over the place, the early mornings, the nerves before a ride, the excitement afterward, and even the chaos of trying to get everyone and everything home in one piece.

Maybe not the ratchet straps. I probably won’t miss those. But the rest of it? Absolutely. Eloise is already planning to compete with Tess next year, and I’m ALL IN.

Hagyard 2027, here we come! Preferably in a vehicle that doesn’t require a toolbox and a roll of duct tape to make the trip. But no promises. 😂